This story initially appeared on Behind the Whistle, the official blog of the IWLCA, and is being republished with permission from the organization. Riley Smith is the associate head coach at Wesleyan University.

We all get into coaching for more than just the X’s and O’s of lacrosse. We aim to guide, support and lead these women into success and growth, teaching them lifelong lessons and skills along the way. For myself, I live for those light bulb moments, the moments where something clicks in my player’s head, and the look they give you is of pure knowledge and excitement.

Whether it is on the field teaching the same concept for the 10th time but changing one word and somehow that makes the difference, or in the office when they need advice on anything, it never gets old; those moments are what makes coaching worth it some days. We often have these moments as coaches and should aim to challenge ourselves to have them frequently.

I had a light bulb moment my first year of coaching, and it still guides me as one of my top coaching philosophies. These young women want to know you care, and they want to know it continually. It is not just as members of the team; it is as humans first, and then as student-athletes. I know it might sound crazy — like of course the players want this — but can you truthfully say that you make a daily effort to show that you care about them individually? They are all unique. Some want to tell you everything, others nothing at all, but that does not mean they do not want to have the verbal affirmation of your caring. All it takes is one question each day. It sounds so simple, but the impact it has on a team’s culture and buy-in is unmatched.

One question each day can change a program, change a culture and impact so many of our athletes. Could you imagine going to work every day for a boss that never takes the time of day to ask you about your life outside of work? Demands you push your body to the extremes, wake up at crazy hours, but doesn’t even check in to see if you are fueling it properly? Imagine that boss correcting you, yelling at you, but not even knowing if you’re just having a bad day.

It does not have to be complex. Sometimes, it is just asking how their day is going so far, or what they ate for breakfast. Some days it turns into a long conversation and distracts them from stretching but makes them smile and ready to start the best two hours of their day. Other days it is asking what they have coming up in school or how their family is. Sometimes the answer is quick, and you move on, taking note they were short to check back in later. Other days you get a visceral emotional response that would have been suppressed all practice; you address it, and again, get them ready for the best two hours of their day.

So why spend warmups walking through stretching lines going through 35 different questions? Because when there are two minutes left in the game and you’re down by one, I promise you, the grit and passion your players will find and play with is far more important than the play you draw up. These young women will push themselves harder and further, dig deeper, giving everything they have. And knowing that the coach they are representing cares and would do anything for them, will allow for this. As soon as they know you will do anything for them, they will do anything for you.

If you want to make an impression, and you want to make an impact on your players’ lives, go out of your way to ask them simple questions and listen to their replies.

As we adjust to these crazy times, I challenge you to ask each player one simple question each day. They need to know we are here for them beyond the restraints of the lacrosse field. We are here for them for anything they need, no matter how small or big it is. I never want to coach a player who does not leave knowing that I would run through a brick wall for them. I want the relationship to last, impacts to be felt, lessons taught, passed on and for them to know I cared.