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I have gotten around to speak with a lot of young lacrosse players in recent days. I am always emphasizing to them that the road to their development in the game includes mastering the fundamentals, listening to your coaches, learning to be a great passer, playing other sports and, most importantly, aspiring to be a leader among your peers.

To truly reach this final goal, a young player would need to develop and exhibit all the leadership qualities about which I wrote in this series  for US Lacrosse — fearlessness, selflessness, honesty, work ethic and self-discipline. A young player willing to embody these aspirational goals could not help but also become an athlete approaching his true competitive playing potential. You are not sacrificing individual development, you are enhancing it.

When I was first introduced to Harlem Lacrosse about five years ago, it was the founder, Simon Cataldo, who said to me that the primary mission of the organization was to “grow the child.” Harlem Lacrosse was developing a model that used lacrosse to reach underserved young men and women in the inner city. While I was mystified to consider that our sport was such an effective tool in this unlikely environment, I quickly came to appreciate that a young person with some proper mentoring and coaching learns to love this game like any kid growing up in Baltimore or Long Island. Harlem Lacrosse’s determination of its own success was not calculated by counting heads, but rather by whether or not it was changing lives. One at a time was fine.

So, an individual athlete who aspires to lead enhances his individual development without obsessing about it, and Harlem Lacrosse is growing the game among a population that never would have found it without considering the sport’s overall growth as only a secondary goal of the organization. This premise of unintended consequences has struck a chord. While our game continues to be one of the only sports still growing nationally, its growth rate has slowed. Is this a permanent adjustment or a temporary hiatus?

US Lacrosse has moved in to new headquarters and is always searching for methods to increase exposure. Club coaches and a new entrepreneurial class in lacrosse look to combine an increased growth in numbers with a flourishing bottom line. The MLL, the NLL, the UWLX and the WPLL are looking for new fans to drive attendance.

TV coverage, lacrosse networks and a social media blitz have not produced the anticipated consistently dramatic increases in participation.

It is understandable that industry leaders anguish over this incremental growth. The answer to questions of investment in research and development, sponsorships, facilities, etc., arrives as an educated guess about the state of the game in the future. What if the development of sustainable growth in the game needs an evolving model, with innovative priorities?

As I search for those activities, in this post-coaching life, where I can still have influence in the game, I find myself drawn again to Simon’s early call.

Grow the child.

Although my recent travels throughout the lacrosse world have brought me in to contact with a strikingly diverse range of teams, coaches, fans and administrators, I corrected a recent host who introduced me as “having done so much for the growth of the game.” I was struck at that very moment with an overwhelming sense that this was not my priority. I wasn’t there to spread the gospel or to simply give a motivational talk. I wanted to actually help a coach, reach a young person. I wanted to change someone’s life, make the world a slightly better place. Giving speeches, handing out sticks, stickers, copies of a magazine, etc., can be a benevolent (and necessary) introduction to the game.

I wanted more, however, by focusing on less. While it is not wrong to gauge success on increased profits and registration numbers, the appeal of our game has always embraced a more personal connection. You do not have to blow up the corporate model and, indeed, you need everyone’s best effort. But let’s be mindful of the game’s higher calling. Seize on the spirituality of lacrosse by trying to change a life. Extend yourself to someone in need. Follow up with a young person after practice. Offer to become a mentor, a big brother or sister. Be a tutor. Write a letter of support. Call that person back. Meet someone for lunch.

How about retired coaches offering their expertise to urban program directors and students once a week, once a month?  In addition to the Harlem Lacrosse programs in New York, Philadelphia, Boston, Baltimore and Los Angeles, there is OWLS Lacrosse in Chicago, Rosemary Hills in D.C., City Lax in both New York and Denver and US Lacrosse urban start-ups in Albany and Cleveland.

Could US Lacrosse act as the broker that puts college programs/coaches and former players together with these urban institutions? Wagner College could “adopt” one of these NYC schools, Hofstra another, Boston College and BU in Beantown, Penn and Drexel, UMBC and Loyola, Richmond, Northwestern, etc. Imagine a college freshman being assigned an urban high school freshman in pursuit of an individual relationship. How about all the New York lacrosse/finance guys getting themselves organized to help coach, mentor and/or monitor a study hall once a month?

We might really make a difference in someone’s life. The potential seems limitless. I realize that I am not as busy as I used to be, but there is a wise saying, “If you want something done, give it to a busy man.” This may just be a reminder for those of us who grew up in the game. There is a greater chance to develop a sustainable, positive model for lacrosse if we inspire each other to grow the game one act of kindness at a time.

Dom Starsia, a National Lacrosse Hall of Famer and US Lacrosse Magazine contributor, is one of the winningest coaches in NCAA Division I men's lacrosse history. Starsia compiled 375 wins in 34 seasons at Brown and Virginia, leading the Cavaliers to four NCAA championships, and is an assistant coach for MLL's Boston Cannons. He was a two-time All-American defenseman at Brown and played for the U.S. national team in 1978.