The IWLCA and One Love Foundation are collaborating on a unique weekend of clinics Nov. 2-3.
The collaboration, called Lax with Love, is part of a joint effort to empower young women on and off the field and educate them about healthy relationships.
The IWLCA always has been a strong supporter of One Love, which was formed in 2010 in response to former Virginia women’s lacrosse player Yeardley Love’s murder at the hands of boyfriend George Huguely, a former Virginia men’s lacrosse player. There have been events connecting the two organizations, but never anything so wide-reaching and all-encompassing as this.
“So many people have done runs for One Love and lacrosse events, but this is the first combination where we’ve brought over 60 college coaches to six different sites to coach a clinic,” Virginia coach Julie Myers said. “But then to also have an educational piece to it is what I think really separates the Lax with Love day from playing in a lacrosse tournament for One Love or running in a run for One Love.
“It’s a super-cool combination of the two things. It’s great awareness. That education piece is what is going to be just as important as going out and learning some new skills and getting a little bit better at lacrosse. [Participants are] going to be leaving with knowledge of healthy behaviors and relationships for all of their relationships. That’s a pretty special piece of the day.”
The clinics will be held at six different schools spread geographically around the country. Duke will host a clinic Saturday, Nov. 2. Cal, Holy Cross, Penn, UMBC and Virginia will host clinics Sunday, Nov. 3.
“It’s a great way to show how unified we are as a coaching body,” Holy Cross coach Amanda Belichick said. “It’s such an important cause and something that impacted the lacrosse community. Many of us remember where we were when we heard about what happened to Yeardley Love. We want to show our support. It’s more than writing a check. To be a part of it and provide this opportunity is important.”
Not only will college coaches from all three divisions be there to teach lacrosse skills, but also educational facilitators from One Love will offer steps to recognizing healthy and unhealthy relationships, as well as how to foster healthy relationships and respond to unhealthy relationships. They will focus on all kinds of relationships, including friendships and teammates and not just romantic ones.
“Lacrosse is a huge part of Yeardley’s life,” One Love CEO Katie Hood said. “As a community, we care a lot about this. This is incredible for us, and it’s awesome to partner with the IWLCA to raise the visibility of the work. The real hope is that we help individuals in their lives. Partnerships are at the core of what we do. We couldn’t do anything without partnerships. It’s fantastic that the IWLCA is stepping into this. We’re thrilled about that opportunity.”
Parents, too, will be included.
“We’ll be doing a short 20-minute intro session where we share the history of One Love and how we’ve grown and the work that we do and explain the information that their kids are going to be getting,” said One Love’s Emily Lloyd, who is coordinating the facilitators. “And there will be a brief session about how to talk to your kids about healthy and unhealthy relationships and what to do if they’re worried that someone you love might be in an unhealthy relationship.”
All proceeds from the clinics will support the One Love Foundation. Registration remains open at laxwithlove.com/camps, but already the New England and California sites are close to selling out.
“We’re getting kids from all different places,” said Liz Robertshaw, coordinator of Lax with Love. “That’s important. If we can start spreading information about healthy relationships at a younger age, then by the time they get to college coaches, it’s not new and college coaches can breathe a little easier.”
The IWLCA has received strong support from its member schools and coaches. It’s a non-recruiting weekend for Division I coaches, yet many of them are giving up their weekend to serve at Lax with Love.
“I don’t think anything like this has done before,” IWLCA president Kathy Taylor said. “This particular cause and philanthropy is very near and dear to our sport. It evolved from a very sad story about a young woman who played lacrosse. It is an ongoing problem in today’s society — relationships that can get violent. We felt as a collective group this is something we needed to get behind — healthy relationships and getting the word out and educating people. One Love has done an outstanding job in building a platform of education and awareness. We felt that our organization could also help support that.”
The far-ranging involvement is a statement of the importance of One Love and its message. Lax with Love also hopes to get the IMLCA involved in future clinics.
“We want to arm our student-athletes with knowledge and power so that they feel they can make great choices,” Robertshaw said. “By not addressing it and bringing it to the table, bad things happen when we do that. I love the fact that everyone sees that one, there’s an issue with relationship violence, and two, there’s a group that’s close to the lacrosse community’s heart that’s taking a step and we can all support it. It was so nice to see people’s egos jump in the back and see them say, ‘How can I help, what can I do?’ That speaks volumes of the lacrosse community. I’m not surprised by it. Any time a tragedy happens, or the lacrosse community needs to jump in, I feel they do because we are such a great family.”
Many college coaches have done One Love workshops with their teams. UVA does at least one annually, while the team also clears its calendar to participate in a 5k that is organized by Love’s sorority and to support alumni who do fundraising for One Love on their own. Senior captain Lauren Martin is a One Love facilitator who keeps the team involved and aware.
“When I see the other schools that jumped in and said they’d be a host site and the list of 60-plus colleges that will be represented, the message is so strong, and it really touches my heart,” Myers said. “I know it’s really special for One Love as well.”
Four years ago, Cal coach Brooke Eubanks’ squad went through facilitator training so the players could serve as educators for the entire Cal athletic department. On Saturday, her current crop of players will undergo an escalation workshop. Next week, they will be trained as facilitators and can choose if they would like to help at the Lax with Love clinic on campus.
“It’s really all about consistent conversation about it,” Eubanks said. “It’s something that’s not going to get handled overnight. It’s important to continue the conversations every year. It’s not just sitting and listening. It’s also learning and trying to spread it to others. It’s that whole see-something say-something idea, and it’s encouraging others to be a part of healthy relationships and spreading the word.”
Added Belichick: “It’s a great opportunity to have discussions about issues that do impact their lives, whether it’s now or something in the future or in the past. It’s a great conversation about things that are real in our culture, and something that’s not talked about as much as it should be. It creates a safe environment to have those discussions. Any time you have a chance to challenge young people to think about those things is a good thing. We want them to be able to recognize those signs between healthy and unhealthy relationships. It’s important for young people to have that knowledge.”
One Love is trying to spread its message as quickly as possible. The organization relies on a model by which those that are trained can then train others. In May, One Love will commemorate the 10th anniversary of Love’s death and challenge college athletic programs to complete at least one workshop from One Love in 2020 to honor her and show a commitment to spreading information about fostering healthy relationships.
“The motivation for doing what we do,” Hood said, “is we think if Yeardley or any of her friends had had the films and discussion guides or experienced these workshops, they would have been able to see the signs that she was not only in an unhealthy relationship, but was at risk. They would have known what to do, because our workshops really focus on, can you see the signs and where do you go for help?”
Lax with Love represents another step to promoting that message. It’s a unique offering that both the IWLCA and One Love are hoping can help prevent another tragedy.
“Sharon Love and her family and the foundation have been able to take probably the most tragic day of our lives to date and turn it into something so positive and powerful and to put other people first,” Myers said. “Having been there that day of all the way throughout — I can’t believe it’s been [nearly] 10 years. In some ways, it feels like yesterday. In other ways, it feels like so much time has passed when you think of where her friends are now. It’s awesome we are a site. We were honored to be one of the sites, and we’re happy to bring our colleagues in to try to help us coach and make this a great day. It’s going to be really special.”