Michelle Tumolo has always been unique, and she knows it.
Tumolo, who grew up in Mullica Hills in South New Jersey, always had a signature style, but she didn’t find lacrosse until high school. Once she picked up a stick, she knew she wanted to find her own place in this game.
“As soon as that stick hit my hand, it was just like a magic wand, and I felt a light inside my heart and my mind,” she said. “It ignited a young girl with passion and love for the game.”
Lacrosse became the vehicle for Tumolo to express her unique qualities and flare for the dramatic. She studied the highlights of Gary Gait and Katrina Dowd — two players who changed the game with their signature moves. She aspired to be different, just like them.
Tumolo, as she grew into one of the most talented players in the world, knew there was another aspect of her life that made her different. She used sports to help her develop the confidence to come out as gay — both to her friends and family and the lacrosse community at large.
Now, she’s become the same role model to young lacrosse players as Dowd and Gait were to her years ago. A U.S. Women’s National Team gold medalist in 2017 and a professional women’s lacrosse player, Tumolo is one of the most recognizable faces in the sport.
She joined Paul Carcaterra for Season 3, Episode 7 of the 'Overtime' podcast in March, sharing the story of her lacrosse career and why she’s so willing to give back to girls that seek her advice.
“I’ve always been myself with [my identity], but that goes along with being a role model,” Tumolo said. “Kids are always messaging me on Instagram about different things, and I make sure I respond because I want to be a role model for them, because I know some people don’t have it as easy as I do.”
But it wasn’t always easy for Tumolo. She spent much of her high school days at Clearview Regional anxious about going to class and uncomfortable with her identity. She continued playing sports and started to become more confident in herself.
The more she played, the more she learned that being Michelle Tumolo was just fine.
“I needed to do some soul searching to make sure this is who I am, I am confident in that and I turned to sports for that,” she said. “I was a sports jock in school, but this other side of me that was going on in my head that kids didn’t know was, 'I am gay.' What is this new avenue in life and journey for me?”
By senior year, she was ready to come out. She went sibling-by-sibling (two brothers and two sisters) in telling her family, waiting until the moment was right to deliver the news to her parents.
The result? Tumolo’s family could not be more welcoming of her identity. That allowed her to focus on lacrosse, a sport she’s used to travel the world and make an impact.
She starred at Syracuse for four seasons before moving on to professional lacrosse and a career in coaching. She narrowly missed out on the 2013 U.S. National Team, rehabbed a torn ACL and made her return in 2017, winning gold in England.
Today, she’s leading a Wagner women’s lacrosse program to new heights while balancing a professional career in the Women’s Professional Lacrosse League. She has her sights set on another run for gold in 2021.
“I know I have one more in me,” Tumolo said to Carcaterra.
Tumolo said she knows she’s got a few years left on the field, but her impact on young players will last longer than that. She’s advocating for any lacrosse player struggling with their identity, and she’s not going to stop anytime soon.
“I want to be that light for [kids], so I try to reach out to every kid that needs help,” she said. “It is a crazy time. Kids come out at different times and kids take it easier than others, but I definitely identify with that adversity in the lacrosse world. I definitely think we can get to a higher level with it all.”